Yelena Ivanova
The situation is even more acute when dating. According to opinion polls, 63% of Americans refuse to meet partners who do not share their opinions about Donald Trump. Since the 2016 presidential election, the dating site OkCupid has seen a 64% increase in the amount of political information in user profiles. A 2017 eHarmony study found that half of the users mentioned Trump in a positive or negative way. Further more. Now on dating sites there are groups only for supporters of some political views. There is a group "For Conservatives Only" or "TrumpSingles", "Single / Single to Trump". This spring, the American Perspectives Survey conducted a study of how politics influences the highly personal decisions of Americans.
There are several political themes that make dating impossible and disrupting marriage: climate change, gun control, respect for LGBT rights, racial differences, political views and attitudes towards parties, religious freedom and attitudes towards abortion.
But the main point on which people disagree is Donald Trump. 63% of Americans said they would not even start dating if the future partner's opinion of the American president differs from his own. For women, Trump is more of an irresistible moment than for men. 7 out of 10 women said that they will start dating only if the man's views on Donald Trump coincide with their own. Men are more “omnivorous” in this regard: only 55% are not ready to meet women who think of Trump differently than they do. But for as many as 45% of men, women's opinion on this matter is indifferent.
Three quarters of Democratic Party supporters (73%) are not ready to meet with partners of opposing views of Trump. Conservatives are more open in this matter, only 54% of them are purists, the rest are ready to listen to different opinions about the American president on their first and subsequent dates.
For those with very strong feelings for Donald Trump, the president has become an insurmountable obstacle to personal happiness. 83% of Americans who hate him will never go on a date with those who love him. 59% of Trumpists reject Donald Trump's critics.
On the family front, things are no better. In many families, political scandals have become more frequent. Ken Jewell, a New York-based divorce lawyer, says that since Donald Trump was elected president in 2016, partners are much more likely to file for divorce due to political differences and opposing views on political movements such as Black Lives Matter. (movement in defense of African Americans).
“During the presidential election years, the number of divorces is much less, because people do not know how life will change. But this year has become just crazy”, - says the lawyer.
In June, Jeremiah Dempsey, a cyber security specialist in South Carolina, broke up with his partner. The reason is politics. He is a conservative, she is a liberal. The two argued on all issues, from the decisions of the Supreme Court to the fight against the pandemic. “I'm a fan of Club 49 from San Francisco. She sends me a picture of the masked team members and writes, "You need a mask too". "I won't wear a mask, you won't succeed". She writes to me: "Why won't it work?" I do not have time to answer her, but she immediately writes: "Forget it".
Patricia Pearson divorced her husband after 12 years of marriage over Trump scandals. She is liberal, he is a conservative, but before Trump, politics never interfered in their personal lives. “He even voted for Obama,” says Pat. "But since Trump came in, everything has changed, and there has been no peace in the house." They fought over immigration and the child protection program for undocumented immigrants. But the rift came when local restaurants were allowed to serve customers inside. “I said I didn't like it. He got angry with me and shouted that I didn't understand anything, and because of people like me, the economy would collapse”, - the woman says.
Dating agency owner Maureen Nelson has felt this change in her own business. Previously, people were looking for successful, beautiful and smart partners, Now the main thing is political community. She recently hosted an online date for a conservative and a society girl with no political preference. After a virtual date, the girl called her: “It was terrible! Trump is, Trump is! I tell her: "But you told me that you don't care". She replies: “No conservatives. We are urgently changing our approach!"
In 2018, the dating platform Bamble introduced a new filter for political preferences. Since then, 40% of users include it when pairing. The closer the elections, the deeper the trenches. For the current quarter, the number of requests for membership in a political party has increased by 51%, according to dating.com platform. Another platform's global communications manager says seekers for a couple have answered 100 million times when asked about political affiliation.
Maggie Sargent, a Los Angeles-based conservative and producer, supports Trump. She is looking only for a person of conservative convictions. “For 4 years in a row I have met with the Democrats. It is very difficult to find a conservative in our industry. But every time it ended the same - bad, ”she says. "Now I'm running from the leftists like the plague".
Families also became uncomfortable. Christina Mullins' father wrote in his will that she would lose her inheritance if she married a Democrat.
The owner of the website "Liberal Hearts" Salvator Prano has never experienced such a success in his business. “In the 16 years of Bush and Obama’s presidency, even the most implacable party supporters have learned to get along with friends and family members who differ from their convictions. But now we are not talking about a party, but about one person”, - says Prano. “A couple of weeks after Trump's victory, the user wrote on her profile:“ I divorced my husband. He voted for Trump!"
Jenny Farley says Hillary Clinton's loss to Donald Trump nearly ruined her marriage. “The elections were in November, and in January we already went to a psychologist for marriage consultations,” says the mother of three. “I started having an existential crisis. I wondered if it was true that he was such a terrible person? And this is the father of my three children? " Only thanks to the psychologist, they realized that the family is more important and that they cannot change each other.
Susan and Nelson Peacock were also able to overcome political differences, although she worked for Bush, and he worked for Clinton and Obama. A simple solution was found: now they watch the news in different rooms. He is CNN in the bedroom and she is Fox News in the kitchen. And it brings them closer.