Kissing to the anthem of Russia... In St. Petersburg, the Rules for marriage were drawn up

Leonid Zlotov

The city authorities of St. Petersburg have developed a detailed project "On the procedure for concluding marriage in a solemn atmosphere". It is published on the website of the administration of St. Petersburg.

Judging by this epoch-making document, from now on it is impossible to be in inappropriate (non-ceremonial) or outerwear during the ceremony. Married couples are also prohibited from changing their appearance, including "visually changing their gender with the help of appearance (make-up, clothes)". Yes, and now it will not work to drink champagne in the registry office: a complete ban has been introduced on alcoholic beverages. Also banned are their own musicians, sound equipment, and pyrotechnics.

Moreover, the custom of throwing sweets, cereals, coins and flower petals, alien to Russia, will become a thing of the past, for this you can get a punishment - the document provides that if the new rules are violated, registry office employees will be able to contact law enforcement officers.

And finally: you can’t also “use mobile communications in offices and the ceremonial hall, take photos, videos and audio recordings in the paperwork office, use electrical outlets.”

Thus, we have to state that this is not just another manifestation of bureaucratic stupidity, but also the eternal Russian administrative delight in the form of small and medium-sized bans wherever the hand of a bureaucrat reaches.

As one of the readers of the project advised: “In the place of the spouses, I would bring gypsies and a bear. They are not on the banned list. And if not, then you can take them. Let them rage. Or she would live "in sin." How much you want. Or I would just come in to sign, if necessary, and that’s it, and let their official solemnity may butt out... "

Other comments to match:

- Have a dress code been prescribed for employees? The lady registrar can be with a false mustache? Or is a permanent enough?

- Kiss only under the national anthem of Russia! And so that children are born strictly according to the schedule of the Baby House!

- It was forbidden to push tulle and curtains on the windows. Aren't they forbidden to blow your nose?

- It's good that no one has yet forbidden to register a marriage simply in the registry office, without a celebration. Life hack for newlyweds: forget about wedding palaces, limousines, restaurants and formal dresses. You go to the registry office, write an application, sign. Everything. Profit! No wedding loans, no spending. My wife and I did just that, we have been together for 15 years.

- Not only that, on the wedding night, too, should play the anthem! This should be supervised by specially authorized people. The flag and coat of arms are also strictly required, as is the portrait of the head above the head of the bed.

- And the length of the bride's dress will also be established by law? What about hairstyles? And the decorations? And who will evaluate? And when - at the door of the registry office?