But we could have lived in different way: what have Russian children lost because of the "law of Dima Yakovlev"
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But we could have lived in different way: what have Russian children lost because of the "law of Dima Yakovlev"

29 July , 10:23Society
In the overwhelming majority of cases, adopted children found attention and respect in their new homeland, which they were deprived of in Russia.

Lawyer Yulia Nikolayeva recalled the ill-fated “law of Dima Yakovlev”, or, as Russian human rights activists called it, “the law of scoundrels” in connection with the story that happened to one of her American acquaintances:

“I have an American friend who adopted a Russian girl. Has managed to pass the law of scoundrels. I chose on the principle of "who has the least chance". Stopped at a 12-year-old girl. As for us, the older the child, the less adoptable. She was not frightened by the origin of the girl from a family of drunken alcoholics, whose second child at 2 years old drowned in a barrel of pickles, nor the difficult age, nor the girl's difficult character. The procedure, however, took 3 years, and the girl came to America at 15, with an established cruel orphanage psyche, having gone through all the circles of orphan hazing and tried everything - from glue and alcohol to violent sex and theft. She perceived her adopted American mother as a blissful eccentric and frankly despised her. She ran away from home, refused to go to school, was terribly rude to everyone around her, and generally radiated hatred and aggression, demanding to return her to her homeland. I saw her in the first months of my stay here and, to be honest, I sympathized with my friend and did not believe that something would come of this venture. She was hellishly patient and, as if, did not notice the girl's completely unbearable behavior, very calmly and calmly explaining and explaining something to her. I do not know all the details of the transformation, but the girl graduated from the American school well and entered a good university. I once asked her a direct question - what happened that made you think and act differently?

- PERSONAL INVOLVEMENT, - answered the girl, - I saw that there are people who are not indifferent to me, who want me to be happy, who are ready to take care of me, despite the fact that I behave like the last rubbish. I saw that life can be different, that it can be without violence, endless struggle and constant gaining a place under the sun. I learned that there are people who do not betray or deceive. I realized that, unlike my homeland, where my path was predetermined by circumstances, in this country everything depends only on me. I realized that I can become HAPPY.

***

Since then, I have learned several more similar stories, in which children were not only from families of drunkards deprived of parental rights, but also disabled refuseniks, who in Russia were identified as a hopeless, quickly dying ballast, and American parents managed to cure, raise and put on legs.

How many children have lost their future during this time and simply died thanks to the law of Dima Yakovlev. And the people who voted for him live, and very well. And they don't dream of bloody boys at night. I really hope, for the time being..."

Blog readers in connection with this story, remembered their own:

- I also know this story. A brother in Russia eats out a miserable existence after boarding school, is considered mentally retarded, and a sister (who was taken to America) serves in the police and raises two children.

- My former colleague, a forensic psychiatrist and his wife, a psychologist, adopted two boys aged 8 and 6 from Bryansk in the early 2000s. Their mother is an alcoholic. The youngest boy was diagnosed as mentally retarded. Both children have successfully finished school and are studying at the university. In addition, both play musical instruments and go in for sports. My colleague really wanted the boys to have a connection with the Russian-speaking diaspora, so as not to forget the language and culture, but, unfortunately, the boys flatly refused to communicate with the Russian-speaking. The biological mother has more children, whom she gave birth later and abandoned them, but the younger children could not be taken to the States due to a well-known law...

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